Friday, September 27, 2013

:: I Started Out speaking English::

 
So…about a week ago, I got this phone.
 
It's like having a Furby...remember those?  

orange Furby

It won't be quiet when I want it to, it gives notice of everything. 
I have no idea where the batteries are; or anything, …you know?

Not sure how I feel about that. 

Like everything, you have to learn to use it,right?  But it helps to know the lingo.
The jargon.
The vernacular.  
There are new words coming into my vocabulary now, ...almost exponentially.
I would never put the pronoun “I” ---before, an object, that already has a name.
Why is my phone now an iphone? Why are tunes, now…iTunes? Why ‘iCloudfor global storage place in the wild blue yonder?  Why a cloud at all?  But, now… I own an iphone? 
IT’S NOT EVEN THE NEWEST iPhone! 

IPHONE 4S

I told my brother I didn’t have google + on my phone.  He insisted I did. After we got off the phone, I pushed the button…and at my command, I was off to the istore?

No. It’s an App-store.

I hardly ever…almost NEVER. used the word ‘APP’ for anything.
I would say …application, as in “I must fill out this application,first.”
Or, I would say, applicator or apply, as in “I use the applicator to apply my mascara.”

Never, ‘APP’. 

I gave my brother this explanation ,as to why “APP”.  He is much more knowledgeable than myself about these things. He listened intently, WITHOUT INTERRUPTING; and He never corrected me.

Now, I’m wondering if he was just being nice OR he didn’t want to hurt my feelings by telling me---
I was putting too much thought into all this; and “app” is just short for apple?

So, I went there and downloaded an APP for Google Hangouts… BECAUSE WE WERE ALL OUT OF HANGOUTS.

Hangouts? you say. Why, you have Facetime? That is because…not everyone has Facetime. Some people have a smart phone…called an Android and apparently, it comes with google + and you can Hangout on there and see each other when your talking. Rather, than having FACE TIME.
Both the same. (I know, I’ll probably get hate mail for that one.)

So,...I tried it. That isn’t what- it’s- all -about.  I’m fairly certain…with either APP
it is the NOSE HAIR DETECTION APP.

 It is not for the squeamish…I can tell you that.

My daughter told me to box “it up and send it back.”

Then, I wondered… if she’d know how to use a KEY on a pair of VINTAGE roller-skates?
skates and key
:SOURCE:

Would SHE box them up, and take them back to the store? Wool Worth’s , Montgomery Wards…OR THE ROLLER SKATE STORE?
Would she fumble around with them; UNTIL THEY WERE SUFFICIENTLY APPlied TO HER TENNIES …
and try to skate with them anyway?

That is how I felt this week.
Like I was Fumbling around on an new pair of roller-skates 

…AND LEARNING FURBISH.







"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold, new things have come." ~2 Corinthians 5:17































9 comments:

Maureen Wyatt said...

Hilarious! Is there ever a time we can stop learning this stuff? I can't find my page on my Kindle and all the keys are in the wrong place on my new laptop. I've had a Blackberry for 3 yrs. and and still don't know how to really use it. sigh Oh, and I can't get the Furby someone gave me for my grandkids to shut up!

Diane said...

Jive to me, dude. Don't dig the new hip talk on the street. It's not my bag.

June G. said...

I had an iphone about a year ago. I listened to my daughter and sent it back!! Happy with my android phone....I'm even learning a few new things and it doesn't bother me constantly! I'm old enough to have had a pair of those neat "shoe skates". Have a nice weekend.

The Paisley Butterfly said...

Love the bible verse.

Kathy Felsted Usher said...

Remember, DON'T throw it across the room in frustration. It's expensive. Find a ten yr old, tell them what you want and have them program it for you.

Gail Wilson said...

Great analogy Patricia.... with the roller skates. I love reading your posts, you're so poetic in the way you write.
Just heard the word app on t.v. the news station advertising their weather app. I have a few apps on my smart phone. My favorite? the Etsy app that goes cha-CHING when I make a sale. :)
Jamie has the iPhone and I have a droid... we never do a hangout. I should suggest that. I get to see her today. Meeting half-way to celebrate her dad's birthday. The four of us, so it's a day of shopping (junking) and eating! :) With my best friend, it doesn't get any better than that.
anyways... I don't think your smart phone will make you as lazy as mine has. My suggestion--don't take it to bed with you. ;) I do, but hey... louie is my bed mate, and he's not complaining.
enjoy the new technology, embrace it! do NOT box it up and send it back....:)
have a great weekend!

Angel said...

Don't send it back! It's actually an easy to use phone. How do we know the difference? I love mine and love the "apps" I have. I'll suggest a few to you that you might like too.

Cindy said...

Haha! You are very funny, I love my iPhone, it does everything I need it to do away from my computer. I used the map on it to find my way around my city when I was caring for my grands this summer. It was great!
Have a good weekend!

Ceekay-THINKIN of HOME said...

You will grow to love it. There is a place to fix all the beeps and things so they are not so bothersome. Trust me, give it time...you will never want to be without it!

BTW. My SIL taught me to use our home WIFI and free WIFI at places so I don't use up my phone time. Brilliant!