Friday, January 13, 2012

Re Conditioning~

  • Teen Pregnancy
  • Raising an Unwed Mother
  • Death of an infant
  • Terminal Cancer
  • 1 Week of Hospice
  • 2 High Risk Pregnancies
  • Birth Defects
  • Sudden Heart Attack
  • Near Loss of a Spouse
  • Financial Crisis
At first glance this list looks like a random list of events that could happen to anyone. But what I’m really here to share with you is the different ways that grief came sneaking into MY life and robbed Me of Joy and Clarity.
This LIST. IS. MY. LIFE.
~Literally, since January 2008 when my very first grand-child was born; everything on this list has taken place in my life the last 4 years. It has been one CRISIS after another for us; for this family. It has taken me until now to see that While January is a time of Resolutions and Change for most people; for me it is a point on the Calendar that says
---Hold on, the road ahead could get bumpy!
dirt roads -hospital- eggplant dish 003
Let me say this- First, I know whom I am believed am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I’ve committed unto him against that day. Secondly, I’ve never characterized myself as a negative person. I’m more of a realist I suppose. I look at the glass as just being another dish to wash. So, for me to say that a new year spells out nothing but doom and gloom ---comes as a shock to myself more than all you combined!
Believe me, when I say I don’t put this personal list of grief out there for any kind of PITY PARTY or EVEN a ‘there-there,it’ll all be alright’ …No.  I put it there, I think, to get it off my chest; and finally be over it!  To say, Glory to God ---I / We have survived all those little annoyances. I put it out there to say for myself~~ WOW! look at the storm God has brought us through!  dirt roads -hospital- eggplant dish 011
I put it out there as A MONUMENT and reminder!
For me.
A Testimony for you. Maybe you’ve been faced with a crisis. Maybe your going through one right now. I am here to tell you that there is hope and that you my friend can have Joy unspeakable.
Do I have JOY?  The answer is YES!
Honestly, I must say:  SOME DAYS,No. That is all part of reconditioning. 
Do I have clarity?  It’s getting there. Let’s face it Grief can be crippling. For some it can drive them so deep into depression that they become strangers to their friends and family and even themselves. For me, the fog is starting to lift…and I’m again beginning to get back to the old things that DO BRING ME JOY.
I hope to share some things over the next week or so showing you how I’m beginning again to accomplish this RECONDITIONING and what I’m finding in the search for JOY and Clarity.
Consider it pure joy my brethren when face trials of many kinds; because you know that the testing of your faith that develops perseverance. ~ James 1:2-3
I don’t want to leave you with a downer; instead I’m going to share a video with you… and I hope you enjoy it!
This is me…finding JOY! and reconditioning. (smile)
~~ God bless you and Thanks for reading!

9 comments:

Revi said...

Wow - I just read your post, and I must say again, WOW. I'm amazed and inspired that you have the attitude and joy you do. Your testimony affirms my belief that "happiness" is a choice. How we choose to respond to difficulty and trials is what defines us. Your faith and trust in God is apparent - and I am sure you would not be at this hopeful place without it. Wishing you a year of blessings and everything good HE has for you! Following you back, Revi.

The Polka Dot Closet said...

Well, it can ONLY get better! I am having a time in my life right now that is great, and I have this huge dread that it can't last, it almost stops me from enjoying this good time. I worry your list could be mine. I have had a string of years like yours in my past, where I thought Lord what next, but we have lived enough years to know that life cycles and yours is once again cycling up! This recession sure has caused an extra burden on all of us. My Dad once said, well money's not everything until you don't have any! Hey, we're all here to listen, that is what is so fabulous about this wonderful blogging world

Carol

Linda @ Itsy Bits And Pieces said...

This is a beautiful post and one I understand...rather than saying "why me", I think "why NOT me?" Our family has gone through some rough experiences over the past 10 years...but God is good, and gives us strength. I think going through hard things gives you compassion and understanding towards others and you realize life is short... you want to live it fully!

Coleen's Corner said...

You are always my source for hope and inspiration. I admire the honesty of your strength in and through faith. These days it is too easy to follow the crowd into despair, misery and blame. What a wonderful world this would be if we were all a bit more like you. Strength and courage are magnified through faith. You are my magnifying glass. God Bless you and your family. Joy is also a gift from God... may this year be your season of Joy.

shannon i olson said...

oh sweetie what a plate full. First love the video I so wish I could have you over for coffee and we could hang out on a regular basis, we will wait until heaven I guess. Second I too am a realist so I get it, it is what it is...and he is in control. Life is about glory to God not glory to man, but still it gets tough. YOu are an inspiration and I am always, always, always encouraged by your comments to me. Thank you and God Bless

Angel said...

I'm SOOOOOOO happy for you! You made me smile to tears!!!! lylas

Elaine @ Sunny Simple Life said...

I had to re-read your list twice. I cannot believe you have faced that and are still functioning and positive. You are a strong woman for sure and the grace of God has guided you I am sure. I pray that life eases a little for you so you may rest and recoup and most importantly heal.

Deborah Jean at Dandelion House said...

I would say God Bless You but I see he already has... You till have Faith and if Faith there will be joy!!!
many new Blessings in 2012!

nannykim said...

First of all the video is hilarious! I think some of us may be shocked if we sit down and write what we have been through in the last 5 years. There are some things some of us can not share either....but it is amazing how God gives us rich joy...it is amazing. I think thankfulness plays so much in all of this, but it does come through God's grace.
I am thankful God has given you much from Himself through the trials!