Tuesday, July 16, 2013

:: On being Less than Joyful::

Recently, after the switch from Google Reader to Bloglovin-- I found a blog

 DOWN--- TO--- EARTH (sustainability via house and yard work)  It's written by Rhonda (in Australia) a very Wise and knowledgeable woman!

 I had read a couple of years ago, as I was starting out on the Homestead Journey...but I wasn't faithful to check my google reader and I lost it. 

Humming bird silhouette and tiny grasshopper on the power line. 

NOTE:  DON'T CONFUSE THIS BLOG WITH Down to Earth Style (by: Holly) also a wise and knowledgeable woman...and a savvy decorator too! :)  different blog- similar name. 

  I just started reading DOWN --- TO ---EARTH again AND! I found this article in the archives (sidebar) and could completely and totally relate to Abby's story. 

So I wanted to share some thoughts with you after reading that post. --

When my children grew up and left...I was quickly thrust into care-giver for my ailing mother in-law; and after she passed, I found myself helping to care for a very sick grand-child,  and within a year of that, I was taking care of my very ill husband.

I think it wasn't until recently that I realized I had been pushing some very hurt and bitter feelings down into my very soul and finding who I was now that the kids were grown--didn't happen for me. I stayed in this limbo of care-giving mode. 
I had to be strong for so many others. I took it upon myself ...to do this work.

I wasn't attending church (still am not at the moment) or reading The Word (I am reading though) , like I had been.

It has been hard...but I'm finally getting to the point that I'm able to function in my home! (or even think clearly) I'd forgotten the scriptures!!!  
There are days when I have felt completely and utterly lost...wandering these 4 walls with no direction. Over the last 18 mos. or so...whenever you've seen scripture at the bottom of my post, as much as I have wanted it to be for YOU... It has been for me. To keep it in my mind! 
Today it is there--because I know it pleases the LORD. 

Thinking back, I was frozen in fear of what to do next?--- all I'd ever done was stay home with the children.  How boring to keep on doing what I'm doing?!  I had lost all of my JOY! 

Finally, a little more than a year ago...I began to plant seeds, I began to research Chickens, and Coop plans...I wanted to take my work outside these 4 walls and do something for myself. Getting my husband settled in his chair, giving his meds, meeting his needs--bought me time outside and away; but my clean and orderly house suffered on the inside. 

(Not just literally, but spiritually, as well.) 

I flounder still, as I don't know it all...and I've certainly forgotten things, like making my own bread (having to relearn some of it) But this is what I know.

"Trust in the LORD and do good, dwell in the land and cultivate faithfulness.
Delight yourself in the LORD and He will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD, Trust also in Him and He will do it. "
~Psalm 37:3-5~ 

God puts the very desires that we have...in our hearts. 

This is what I want to do. Trust Him. Delight in Him, and Commit my way to Him.

I'd forgotten so many of His promises. I got busy...being busy and forgot to put Him first in all the busy work.  He is changing all that in me.

I get excited now when I see blooms on the vine, I love seeing my laundry flapping in the wind.  I like doing all these SIMPLE things and having my husband  here, healthy, beside me getting to do what I want to do.
There is plenty to be done too. I like that we are on our own schedule now--- with all the time we need. No rushing.
It took a while for me to get to this point; but I'm glad I'm here.
It is comfortable JOYFUL PLACE TO BE and I like it!

It is hard to be Joyful in the midst of grief, financial woes and family struggles. He knows that and all He wants from us is Trust Him. 

I hope you are Trusting Him today and finding Joy and Peace along the way. 

And let us not be weary in well doing for in due season we will reap, if we faint not. ~Galatians 6:9



Art and Sand said...

I am glad that you are finding joy in your life.

I don't own a television so I am not bombarded with ads, but the average American, sees ads constantly telling them that they need more and more and more.

The reason that I was able to retire is because all of our married life we have lived small - one car in our early years, paying cash for things, camping vacations when the kids were little. Other people say we are lucky, but it is not luck. It is being content with what we have and not always wanting the latest new gadget.

Recently I posted about a garden book I heard of Kiss My Assets - Creating a Garden Tailored To You. I have taken that beyond my garden and stopped coveting the beautiful things I see on other blogs. My house, my garden, my life - are all tailored to me - at least I'm working on it.

Enjoy your day.

Side note - Our city was just mentioned in the newspaper as one of the most chicken favored cities. I guess it is easy and permitted to have chickens.

mary_smith said...

I love her blog! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.
Have a wonderful day!

NanaDiana said...

I can so relate to that. I was a caregiver, too...my Dad had Parkinson's Disease and so my brother and I had to run the farm with my Mom at a very young age Then, my mother got dementia-and lived with us for almost 5 years till I couldn't take it anymore-meanwhile had 4 little kids to take care of, too. Then, hubby had brain surgery and was in bed for a year. I was working and trying to keep my head above water. I, too, had lost most of my joy.

I am glad you found your way back! It is not an easy thing to do-to overcome that which has been foisted upon us. God bless you- you're doing GREAT! xo Diana

Lisa Tucker said...

What a lovely post. There is a difference in being happy and finding true joy......and I think true joy is found when the Lord is the center of your life. So glad you found that. Thanks for sharing.

Kristina said...

I have not see that blog, so I will have to take a look at it. Yes, the simple things are such a blessing.

Faith said...

the simple things, are a blessing and help us balance out what we have to deal with. It is hard to have joy sometimes, circumstances beyond our control overshadow...the simple joys rehydrates our souls, thank you for your post today...I needed this.:)

Diane said...

Life can be very tough-- no one warns you when you're young! It can be very hard to be happy. Sometimes I wonder how people do it!! Nice post! Sounds like you're on the right track.

Revi said...

Looking for God's hand in small things is a great way to live. Even when we're enduring a difficult time, He gives us little blessings to remind us He is there with us. If we look for Him, we will find Him. Reading His Word is a great way to hear from Him, and to connect with Him.

Willow said...

Simple pleasures can be so full if joy when our heart is open ... and we trust .
The photo of your chickens running happily and your laundry waving in the wind made me smile and feel peaceful :)

Claudia said...

A beautiful post, Pat.

Thank you.


Anonymous said...

Hanging laundry on the line is one of my favorite childhood memories! I love not running the dryer all the time. Thank you for letting us in on the Down-to Earth blog... Rhonda is amazing and I'm going to enjoy reading her blog just as I enjoy yours! Joy, Joy, Joy, Joy, down in my heart... You remember the rest, I'm sure!

June :)

nannykim said...

Some of my friends are going through similar times. I think it is very difficult to go through these periods in our lives. I even find we can not even realize that we don't have any dreams left. I read a post by Taylor Marshall today that helped in this area. Here is his advice:

1) Get out a sheet of paper and write down all your dreams. The best way to distill this is to imagine yourself on your death bed. When asked, “What legacy did I leave?” It may be difficult for you to answer this, but keep at it. Write it down and chew on it.

2) Next write all of your gifts. If you write “nothing” you are lying yourself and lying to God. 1 Peter 4:10 says God has given each of us a special gift.

3) Now associate your dreams with your gifts. Discover the connections between what you are good at (gifts) and what you want to become (dreams). This is the most difficult part, because it requires you creating a multi-year plan. Perhaps multi-decade.

God promises you this: “Delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” (Psalm 36/37:4)

Tonight when you go to bed, tell Christ that you delight in Him and then ask Him to give you the desires of your heart. Your heartfelt desires are part of His plan. Then establish the routine or “liturgy of life” to fulfill those desires for Him. These three simple steps should help you distill what you are all about. So get out the piece of paper and spend ten minutes mapping it out."

I found this helpful--

Carol OurSearsKitHome said...

What a beautiful post, Pat. So encouraging. Thank you for sharing.